Tuesday, August 14, 2007

Birthday Tomorrow

Well, there it is. The big 3-0. Its kind of funny really. I never imagined that I would be in a foreign country thousands of miles away from home on such a big event (at least for me. ). :-)

Before I even considered this internship, I was looking for ways to celebrate my birthday. I mean 30 could be considered a big deal. I mean, now if I do something totally outrageous, people could think that I'm just going through a mid-life crisis. lol Instead of thinking that I'm just plain crazy. hehehe ;-)

It's kind of a sad point too. I mean, its a time for reflection in a way. A time where I look back at the past 10 years and say, what have I done with my life? And whats really bad, is that I don't like a bit of it. I didn't do much during my past ten years. Let's see, I've been in college non-stop for these past 10 years, which is just...sad. I found love and lost it just as quickly. Been on a few dates, but the opportunities could have been so much more, but I wasn't brave enough to speak up. I've had a total of basically 4 dead-end jobs, had another that I had a great time with, till I was let go (they updated their systems, which no longer required a programmer on their staff). I've had a total of 3 cars, yeah, I think that's correct. Two I ran into the ground, the suburu station wagon, and the Honda Accord. But the third I'm trying to keep as much as I can. :-) (It's a GREAT car!)

I've gotten a total of one degree, an Associates in Liberal Arts. Probably could have gotten a couple more, but didn't really look into it. And I'm STILL working on my degree for Computer Science.

Such an American dream huh? I mean, I'm 30 (almost), I'm still single, no children, no house of my own, no wife, no 3.5 kids, no pets, no bachelors degree, and no career.

God, how depressing huh? :-/

Okay, enough with the downers...what about the bright side? I've gotten more friends these past 10 years than my 20 years prior. I'm working hard towards a degree that I know will keep my interests up and be able to provide for me and my family. My family loves me, which is ALWAYS a joy! Let not forget about all my friends who will always stand by me, even through the times of great grief. I have hobbies that I enjoy (most of which are indoor, which I think I'll have to change), good music, good movies, and good books.

One could say that I'm almost whole spiritually. But I'm not there, not yet. I have to break my shell a little more. Get out of this comfort zone that I've fallen into, and step out a little more. Its scary, most good things are, but necessary. I don't want to be a bachelor for the rest of my life. If it turns out that way, then its just something that I'll have to live with, but its not going to take me without a fight. :-) I'm going to be most stubborn about that! ;-)

Don't get me wrong, its going to be hard. I mean, for a shy, non-drinker like me, its really hard to get out there to find someone. I think I'm going to have to give up looking at Cal Poly. I've tried a little and failed, mostly because of age difference, kind of sad, but its the truth. It's going to be interesting. I mean, I've tried the online scene. Twice actually, and both ended up in disaster. Not really willing to go back to it... not unless I run out of other options. There is the whole bar scene, but once again, I don't drink and well, not sure if I want to pick up someone that does that scene every week. So what does that leave me? Parties? Most of the parties in San Luis are a younger generation. Where else? Not sure. Matchmaker??!! hahaha Whatever...it's time for lunch here, so I'm going to go.

I still need to think of what I want to do tomorrow. I guess a dinner is about all I can really do, seeing that it does fall on a Wednesday. Well, talk to you all later.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Hey, you!!! Being 30 isn't bad...try being 55! Our daughter just got married at 32 so you still have time...and...our other daughter had a baby at 32!! You are still very YOUNG and lots of time to do what you want. Just having the opportunity to be in a different country should be a great accomplishment!!! Most people will never have that chance, including myself. These things you mentioned are all stepping stones...being 30 is just the beginning and you are right, youre life is what you make it!